One method used to combat delinquent loitering is classical music. Could it work at Central High School?
Composers can fight crime. In British Colombia, 1985, Mozart stopped teen delinquents from vandalizing a 7-11. In Florida, 2001, Beethoven and Mozart teamed up and fought drug users on Palm Beach. In 2003, train robberies fell by 33 percent after Bach blessed the ears of criminals for 18 months. If these composers can fight crime all over the world, why can’t they fight crime at Central High School? It’s no secret that there is an abundance of illegal activity at Central, especially in the bathrooms. By bringing classical music into our bathrooms, restrooms can be a safe place again.
It’s not uncommon to walk into the bathroom, just to be met with a cloud of strawberry-flavored smoke. In fact, many students (including myself) refuse to use the bathroom during passing periods due to all the smoking. But it’s not just our school who has this problem. In 2022, the FDA reported 14.1% (2.1 million) of high school students vape. Despite many attempts at fighting the use of illegal substances in schools, vaping is still prevalent. The most common methods used to combat vaping include installing vaping detectors, checking students, removing stall doors, and completely shutting down the bathrooms. Not only do these methods not work, they also affect students who don’t vape.
This is where classical music comes in. Instead of stripping students of their right to privacy and freedom to use the bathroom, we can play classical music in the bathrooms. By filling the air with classical music rather than smoke, vaping is discouraged. Like mentioned in Theodore Gioia’s essay “Bach at the Burger King,” thugs don’t want to commit crimes if classical music is playing in background. The same thing applies to our school bathrooms. People don’t want to crowd stalls and vape if Beethoven is playing. This method of fighting vaping is both practical and doesn’t negatively impact those who don’t vape.
Clearly, vaping is a major problem in schools, but it is one that can be combated with less extreme methods. Instead of letting professionals deal with teens vaping, let’s leave this battle to those who are best at fighting crime: Bach, Beethoven, and Mozart.
Photo: Musician Ignored on Flickr by Lochaven
The Pine Needle 